Tumblr Crushes:
Done and done, almostfancy. You’re right there (in with the rest of the hotties…err…people, and stuff)
iamjustcara replied to your post: So, you want a lawnmower.
I love it when you write
Thank you! One day I hope to be able to do it more often and in a larger format.*
*just like everyone else!
It’s an necessary tool in today’s post-Victorian American suburbia. There are courtesies that need to be abided by to ensure tranquility. Some of these courtesies may be hyper-polite—much like our Victorian predecessors’ social rules and contracts—and not truly necessary to keep people from murdering each other, yet out of behavioral training, we still need that damned lawnmower to keep the grass well groomed.
But the lawn will still look like shit.
In order to truly have a polite, post-Victorian American lawn, you also need a weed whacker. There are always patches of grass next to a tree, pressed against the house’s foundation, or along a fence that a lawnmower simply cannot mow without severe and life-threatening modifications. So, to keep the neighborhood nodding in your direction without malice, you need a weed whacker.
But the lawn will still look like shit.
You just don’t get a full carpet of grass without seeding. There really is no point to mowing a scraggly, patchy lawn to keep the world from hating you if your lawn is patchy and makes the neighbors look at you with an ever growing disdain (no doubt one day turning into outright hatred and several calls to the police about weird animal noises coming from your garage that, if you had seeded your nicely manicured lawn, they would have overlooked). So you definitely need a seeder and you should probably get weed killer while you’re at it because you know a dandelion strewn lawn could lead to some vicious looks as well.
But the lawn will still look like shit.
There are too many dips and divots in that thing. There always will be. You’ll need a wheelbarrow, shovel, and probably a small Japanese manufactured backhoe to straighten that out. You can find all that stuff at Home Depot. The payments are really quite reasonable.
But the lawn will still look like shit.
The lawnmower and weed whacker are finicky beasts. First of all, you need to mix oil and gas just right, otherwise you’ll be traipsing along in a thick blue cloud of smoke while you make sure your neighbors will watch out for burglars when you go on vacation. Secondly, you’re going to need to fix those noisy things once a year, without fail. It’s really not that hard. You just need to get a full socket set, screwdrivers, vice grips, a power drill, and a tool shed to shelter the tools and your frustrated screams while you respool a pull cord.
But the lawn will still look like shit.
It always will. The neighbors’ lawns look like shit too. But as long as they see you, and you see them going through the post-Victorian social rigmarole, everyone will nod approvingly at each other, and no one will call the cops when agitated bleats may or may not be coming from a garage, and everyone will make sure no burglars get in to see what is causing those sounds.
My grandmother told me to eat my crust so my hair would be curly. Yeah, I don’t get it either. But I did. And still do. And you’ve seen my hair, so, there you go.you left the best part
This is what I do when I eat Pizza. I leave the crusts.
You will be denied entry into heaven
I do the same. And my daughter has started to do the same thing, for the same reason. If I wanted extra bread…I’d eat it.
“Pizza bones.” If you’re not going to eat them, I sure will..
Those are called “dog treats”
Hi! We're Planned Parenthood: Masturbation and You (and other people) -
We’re always really surprised by the massive amount of misinformation floating around about masturbation. Crazy-false urban legends about all the bad stuff that will happen to you if you touch yourself kind of transcend every generation and culture. You’ll go blind, you’ll get acne, you’ll grow…
Myth #325: When you masturbate it upsets the people next to you at the urinals.
The hologram of Tupac Shakur has been shot.
There is depth to their work that transcends genre and time. Power, energy, emotion, riffs, melodies, primordial elements mixed with modernity.
The world is much less without MCA. My heart aches for his family, fans, and friends, but also for my own selfish desire to experience more art from those four amazing musicians combining their abilities into something that fills and jostles every one of my senses.
RIP MCA.
when you’re yearning for anything. When exhaustion tempers your mind to the point where it can no longer busy itself with facades of busy thought and fantastic daydreams. When a blank stare replaces active eyes. Everything is more beautiful, but leaves a dull pain where beauty should cause joy.
I like this feeling, occasionally. It’s good to yearn, to feel a dull pain and know that there’s more that I want then what I have. Occasionally this feeling comes, but tomorrow I’ll put on a smile, a glimmer in my eyes, wink at myself in the mirror and like the feeling of my normal smirking contentment.
inthefade replied to your post: andryushacx replied to your photo: They just don’t…
I’m only a 31. ME. A 31.
How the holy hand grenade is that even possible!?
I would have pegged you at somewhere near 5300, mostly due to cheering for all the wrong teams.
andryushacx replied to your photo: They just don’t realize how annoying bad jokes…
Evidently I’m exceedingly annoying. 59 on the Klouchebag scale.
My only saving grace is that I tweet far less than I used to. If I even tweeted once a day, my score would likely be in the billions.
They just don’t realize how annoying bad jokes are.
Edit: This is a screenie from Klouchebag.com, which measures how annoying you are.
I am thirsty!
Once there, we realize that it’s not romantic, but just some small, stupid island that is more difficult to get away from than to get to because there is very little motivation to get back to what we already know awaits us.
(Show me your bums, ladies*)
*That’s the deal. Bruins win, you show me your bum**
**Is too a thing.
a-gay-elephant-called-jonathan:
try turning it off and back on again??
i think the battery is low try charging it
use force quit, then connect to the server and try safari
have you installed the latest iTunes update?
Try CTRL+ALT+DEL
take the battery out for 10 seconds then put it back in, maybe?
escape key?
Try holding down the power button for 30 seconds
it needs an anti-virus
do it old school…. blow in the usb port.
bring up task manager
tap the screen with your fingernails
Unplug the router.
Okay, who installed IE on this thing?
Did you forget to turn off Windows Updates?
I’d say try and restore it to a previous checkpoint in Time Machine. Should do the trick.
Try doing a Crtl-Alt-Delete, and see if you have any frozen applications.
Have you tried unplugging it for 30 seconds and plugging it back in?
Probably a virus. Try scanning the hard drive. That should help.
Try installing CCleaner—your cache might be slowing it down.
(via lmshp)